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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Hump day---Story Time #2

Well, it is Wednesday which means we are all 'stuck' in the middle of the week. We're past Monday, which means we can't bitch and complain about all the reasons as to why Monday "sucks" so terribly bad. And it's not Thursday when we are wish it is Friday. SO, the only thing I can do to help you have a piece of mind is to tell a story that hopefully can make you chuckle and/or laugh (because work sucks, and we all need distractions).

It's that time of year again: Kansas Rural & Small Agents Conference (click on the link, its about me life/this conference-via creeping on Nick's wall).This is a epic showcase of individual insurance brokers, whom sit in meetings for three days straight, and party for two nights straight. It is ridiculous, a lot of free alcohol given by the companies we sell for. I am member of the Young Agents Council (YAC), is an organization of insurance professionals, aged 40 and under, or having been in the insurance industry for less than five years. Which we also participate in our own meetings and other important shit. Last year was my first year, and after a looooooong day of meetings (which I fell asleep in about 25% of them) the YAC surprise us with a dinner, and a party bus for the big city of Salina!! You laugh, but it was an incredible time. There was about 15 of us, majority under the age of 30, but I was the youngest one at 23! We partied and had a great time, met some crazy girls from Winfield, who loved to party, met a rep from Colorado who actually hooked up with one of the girls. Him and I still keep in contact....we're excited for it. Well, little to our knowledge we had to be up at 8 am for our meetings, and it was an on-going joke about us being hungover all day. Meetings went on, hangover continued, until the last evening there. 
---A lot of the 'big-wigs' of some of the companies we worked for came to the hotel where the conference was at, where each company had their own room, with their own beverages and food. All free. I started to chat it up with some of the "vet's" (like Billikin) and shared stories and what not about insurance. Yes, it's exactly what you're thinking---a bunch of older guys in sport coats, button up shirt (unbuttoned), no undershirt, drinking scotch, smoking cigars. Every stereotype you can think of was there. Well these older guys try to convince me and Billikin into going to a strip club with them. Keep in mind, I'm playing beer pong with 40+ year old men during these conversation. Long story short- Billikin says "no" I of course, say "yes". Well I take cabs with the old men to: "Wild Wild West Gentlemen's Club"(which was ranked one of the top strip clubs in Kansas btw ;) ). I walk in, and it's like Varsity Blues-- people everywhere, all insurance agents-men AND women. Hilarious to me. As me and my Colorado buddy walk towards the dance floor... they all start screaming at me....
             side-note- Billikin is kind of "known" in the independent insurance agents world, so apparently I am like  a legacy, that has to live up to their expectations. Not because they know my dad as a partier, but they respect him as a business man.

I walk to where a seat is already saved for me, by about 10 other agents (40+ year olds). The make me lay on my back, throw a bunch of $1 on me, and you can imagine what went down from there. I'm buying drinks, they're buying drinks, strippers are loving me. I truly was put in a 'spot-light' by these men, and the strippers were "LOVIN IT"!!! Anyone who has been to a strip club knows there is always that one dude who thinks a stripper actually likes them or seems interested. Well I wasn't falling for this trick, this one particular stripper named: Sara (stage named; Sparkles) was super interested in me. So interested, in fact, that she asked to clock out early to hang out with me. I'm hammered, she's hammered, we go back to the champagne room (when she's off duty) and we make out... I know, I know gross...but this was a month after me and the SLORE broke up, so I was on the rebound. We make out, a lot for a few hours in the back, I come back out to the dance area, and there is a HUGE applause for me as I walk out with the stripper by the dozen or so middle aged men sitting on creeper row. I got her number, we talked for a few months after the 'incident', she sent me a few special pictures, I felt dirty as hell (but it's just another chapter to the book). I hate strip clubs, I've never enjoyed them, and if you know me you understand that...they're a huge waste of money, and I'm not just saying it to say it. I'm on the fence about texting her to let her know I'm gonna be back in let me know if I should, or not...

Hopefully I can come back next week with an amazing story about my experiences in Salina, KS. Mucho love my peeps... keep shit real on this wonderful 'Hump Day'
couple of the young agents, I met!

All of the YAC members and me pimpin (middle left)

OldTown- last April, for a quarterly YAC meeting


  1. The real question is why SHOULDN'T you text this stripper to let you know you will be back in town?

    Perhaps you should send those 'special' pictures over to me for further investigation and then I could give you a more concrete answer.

  2. haha damn J.O. I don't have them anymore.... otherwise I would... :(